This post, written by Greg, originally appeared on MommyDaddyBlog.com.
I hear it all the time: being a parent is not an easy job, especially when you’re first-time parents. There are so many things to consider, so many new responsibilities to take on. After all, you are taking care of a new, fragile human life. So many new things come into perspective. You now put this new person before yourself. So many questions arise when you’re a new parent: How do I decide what’s best for my child? Is there anything I should encourage my child to do or not do? What if I make mistakes and what effect could those mistakes have on my child? Will the love that I give to my child be sufficient enough? Will I be a good parent? And the list goes on. These questions and more can lead new parents to the assumption that parenting is very difficult and stressful. And although I believe it can be to an extent, I also believe that there is an endless array of objects that can make parenting a little easier.
Which is why I want to hand the mic over to YOU! I’m referring to the moms and dads out there who have overcome the struggles and stresses of raising a new child and lived to see another day! I would like to know what helped (or still helps) to ease those stresses of raising a new child. It can be something small (such as a toy or even a pacifier) or something big (such as a brand new nursery or minivan). It can be something tangible or even something intangible (such as the love from your family). It can be one thing or it can be many things. Whatever it may possibly be, I would like to know:
(My goal here is to help make parenting easier for the people out there who are either expecting their first child [of which includes Mommy and myself] or have just recently had their first child. I believe the more input I can get out of this, the more helpful it can be, as it will introduce all sorts of ways that parenting can be made a little bit more easier for new and expecting parents. So I encourage any and all feedback! I believe that there is no answer too simple or impractical. If it has made parenting easier for you then I’d love to hear it!)
Not reading the parenting books over and over again and wondering what is wrong with my kids! I took a more casual approach and haven’t ever regretted it!
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I have many “things” that help me but my husband is #1. Honestly and seriously. There is nothing in the world like having someone I trust and who loves the child(ren) just as much as I do to take care of them while I get a much needed nap because I’m are so worn out. I can vent to him without fear and I can count on him for grown up conversation after a long day of goofy, singing dinosaurs.
Another thing for me is music. The music I enjoy as well as the music the kids enjoy helps me a lot. It eases frustration, tension and impatience for all of us. When my daughter was a newborn she had colic BAD. For some reason though “Come Away With Me” by Norah Jones seemed to soothe her.
And last, but not near the least, is a glider rocking chair. We gave ours away but it served it’s purpose well for 4 years. :)
we would love to share the ideas of what makes parenting easier for the middle school age as well. Spread the joy!
One of things that made parenting easier for us is to just have fun!! Our kids(4) love it when we get silly with them. And do not try to be super mom, just be the best mom you can be. I have also learned that it ok for the house to be messy sometimes, the kids don’t care.
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[...] asked a question: What has made parenting easier for you? The question garnered such great responses that we created a series based on those responses. The [...]
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I agree with having a schedule. Babies feel so secure when they know what comes next – and SO DO MOMMIES AND DADDIES.
My other advice is: never say never and never say always. I had so many “I will always do thises” and “I will never do thats” with my first baby and I can tell you, I have probably broken every one of them. I was going to breastfeed a year – well, guess what, nature didn’t care to cooperate so we used formula. I would never co-sleep – well, guess what, baby went six whole hours snuggled next to me so you betcha we coslept. I could go on and on.
Breastfeeding might make you miserable. So quit. You may hate cloth diapers. So use Pampers. It is all trial and error. You’ll end up doing lots of other things you never dreamed of.
Of course you have some preconceived notions of what you want to do, but consider them ideas only. **Not benchmarks for what make you a good mommy.** Good mommies go with the flow, listen to their baby’s needs AND their own needs, and adjust accordingly.
And good daddies remind good mommies (sometimes 40 times a day) that the only thing that baby truly needs is love and milk. All the rest is just gravy.
(Good daddies also make sure mommy goes at least one night a week with uninterrupted sleep!)