Transitioning From Co-sleeping

Baby Boogz & Dad Newborn Smoochies

It’s been 21 months of snuggles and convenient nights of sleep. However, somewhere down the line, in the last few months or so, co-sleeping has become less enjoyable.

It’s been 3 months since Jayden decided to wean from “Mama Nom Noms” (breastfeeding). And after being punched and head butt one time too many, I decided the time has come. The time for us to discontinue co-sleeping. The time for Jayden Elijah to start sleeping in his own bed, in his own room. The time for Greg and I to comfortably sleep together in the same bed. To enjoy each other before another baby checks into our bedroom. We’ve already added the Arm’s Reach bassinet to our things to get for our next baby. But until we start brewin’ up another cherub, we anticipate using those few hours of the night to remember what it’s like to be a couple. As parents, it is so easy to lose ourselves throughout long days of parenting and endless todos. Sometimes you just need a break. And a few hours spent alone at night sounds like the perfect getaway.

Like any new routine, it’s going to take some time to establish consistency. Jayden seems to do really well in his bed, but he has to be sleep before laying him down. Ultimately, we’d like for him to have an understanding of bedtime and where he has to sleep when the time comes. We are having a battle with bedtime. By the time he falls asleep, Greg and I are ready to go to bed too. We’ll be working on getting him to go to bed earlier in the near future. Right now we are just trying to get him adjusted to sleeping in his bed…in his room. One thing at a time, right?

For three days, we tried putting him down in his bed. Here are the results.

Day 1: He slept 4hrs in his bed and then came in our room.
Day 2: He slept 4hrs in his bed and then came in our room.
Day 3: I laid him in the bed and no more than 10 minutes, he started to whine. I was too tired to go through the cuddle and run routine, so I just tossed him, ok rolled him, in our bed. He was fine.

Because we are totally not digging having to get up to go in his room every time he wakes up, we decided to move his bed in our room. We moved his bed right next to ours, so that he could climb right in our bed if he needs to. And if he needed a snack, water, or eczema ointment rubbed on his skin, we could be there on demand, everything lined up on the night stand.

Day 1: He slept until the early morning. He got out of the bed and stood by our bedroom crying. Our beds are right next to each other and he goes for the door? We co-slept the rest of the morning.
Day 2: He slept until the early morning. He got up and stood next to his bed crying. We co-slept the rest of the morning.
Day 3: He slept until the early morning.
Day 4: He slept for 2 hours and woke up for water, but couldn’t get settled back into his bed. We cuddled him and put him in our bed.

I’m not sure of what awaits us, but we are so ready for this change. Next step, Operation No Paci. I don’t want to hear it. We did not plan to have him on this long, it just kinda…happened.

Are you currently transitioning from co-sleeping? How is it going? If you have already completed the process, go you! How’d it go?


Day 1 in toddler bed
Day 1 of sleeping in toddler bed.

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Sheena Tatum

is the founder of Sophistishe. She's a free spirit, wife, boy mom, rental rebel, curator of pretty things, lover of vintage pyrex, and the tropics. Sheena can be found in NW Indiana with her husband and two scrumptious boys, clutching kraft paper, chalkboard paint, sriracha and chipotle pepper. In the midst of motherhood, wifedom, and managing a growing collection of digital projects, she somehow manages to find zen in being a quirky, introverted, lil’ lady.

9 Comments

  • January 30, 2010

    tanyetta

    To be honest, if I had a REDO, I would NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER have allowed any of our babies to sleep in the bed with us.

    Needless to say, DJ still rolls up in our room around 3am with his comforter and pillow tolmbout he just wants to make a pallet on the floor. Knowing good and well we are NOT going to allow him to sleep on the floor because we have hardwood floors. The kid is playing us like a tool.

    Baby Gracen on the other hand LOVES her crib.

    Good Luck with your transition. :)

  • January 30, 2010

    Patricia Godfrey

    Oh how I miss those days. My youngest just turned 3 and both her and her brother moved to their own beds around 2. I am one of those moms who just couldn’t come to grips with the idea that my babies were growing up and needed their own space. So every once in a while, when I get lonely, I’ll slip into my daughters room, scoop her up and put her in the bed with me. I’m sure Jayden will transition just fine though.

  • January 30, 2010

    Stephanie

    With my daughter we had her crib in our bedroom for the first 5 months and she would wake up wanting to get in bed with us. Once we moved her in her own room she slept through the night perfectly. With my son, well that is another story. He has been co-sleeping with us inconsistently off and on. It started because he had breathing problems when he was a baby gasping for air in the middle of the night and he would also throw up entire bottles. He always started off in his crib but would wind up in our bed sometime in the morning.
    He now has his own room in our new house and goes down in his toddler bed rather easily. He wakes up around 5 or 6 and comes into our bed demanding food. The most important thing is to be consistent. I know it’s not always easy, it’s definitely not easy for me. Good luck, it will work itself out.

  • January 30, 2010

    FutureMama

    See this is why I’m SO TORN on cosleeping. It seems SO much easier those first few months when you’re breastfeeding, but my friend told me her baby got down to waking up only once a night then they went to Ecuador and slept together for a month and now she’s totally “spoiled” and eats every couple of hours. She says it’ll be so hard to get back to her sleeping alone.

    I REALLY like the idea of sleeping more but I feel like if we tough it out the first few months it’ll be worth it in the long run cause I like having out bed OUR bed, ya know? I’d love your thoughts on it sometime Sheena! I think it’s cute to share a bed but couple time already gets cut down so much after a baby… Maybe we’ll cosleep during naps, it’s a good compromise right?

  • January 30, 2010

    Tara

    We only co-slept for the first six months or so, but it wasn’t consistent. Maybe only three days a week my daughter would sleep with us. She slept in her crib the rest of the time without a peep. But when it was time to transition to the toddler bed, we just put her in the bed with a night light and a sippy cup with a little water in it and then we shut the door. She was too short to open the door so uh, there she stayed for the rest of the night. Man, does that make me a bad mom? I told my daughter not to touch the doorknob. LOL. Uh-uh, get your butt back in the bed!! LOL.

    I do agree that being able to cuddle and stretch out in your adult bed without the little angel in your life kicking you in the head is glorious. But in order to properly transition, I think you need to keep that in mind. I don’t know if it’s harmful to let little man in your bed after he’s slept the whole night in his bed – seems cute to me. But you do have to be consistent. Hmm, is there any special morning routine that could help? Like, if you told him that if he stays in his room until it’s light out (or until you get him) then in the morning he can do XYZ? Is he too young for that? Otherwise, I’m out of ideas!

    As far as the paci thing, girl, I’m not judging you, I’m jealous. Neither of my babies ever took one. Not ever.

  • January 29, 2010

    KYouell

    Ugh. We’re still working on this w/my daughter. Not fun. She won’t give me up at night even though I’m no longer producing any milk. I know that in the big picture this is a short period of our lives, but I’m so tired of being a human pacifier. I’ll be paying close attention so please post if you find something or some way that works.

  • January 29, 2010

    UPrinting

    Definitely take it one thing at a time. That would make the transition easier for your little Jayden. Boy do they grow up fast! At least you get to have some time for yourselves.
    I hope he will be able to transition smoothly from co-sleeping, and even with the bed time too. Operation Paci, oh good luck with that one! That’s bound to be a little harder i think ;)

  • January 28, 2010

    Jenn

    It’s definitely important for you and Greg to reclaim your bed for just the two of you. I wish you luck with this endeavor! As far as our experiences, Alyssa never slept in bed with us, because she wouldn’t relax and fall asleep, even as a newborn. So we kept her in a bassinet next to the bed, and around four months of age moved her into her own room. Ryan did sleep in bed with us, and would either sleep there or in a cradle right next to our bed. Once he started sleeping through the night — around three months of age — we moved him into his own bedroom.
    So unfortunately I can’t give you any tips, because I haven’t had any experience with transitioning an older baby or toddler. :(

  • January 28, 2010

    Shelly

    We never did the co-sleeping thing with any of our 3. A couple weeks ago Dwayne brought a whiney William in the bed with us at 1:30 because we were both past exhaustion. I never got beat up so badly in my sleep before! Sheesh, that won’t be happening anymore unless his is very sick. Otherwise sorry Willie!! Now we are talking about a toddler bed and when we do it, we will be baby-gating his door so we do not have any late night visitors. Mommy and daddy like their privacy :) Good luck to you guys on getting him fully tucked away in his own room.

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