Stop using motherhood as an excuse.

new owl glassesA year ago, I found myself feeling misplaced. I saw a young, supple face, harassed by breakouts like never before… a head full of healthy, full locs with a personality of their own… glasses that slipped and slid, with a prescription way past expiration.

That is not what I had envisioned for my 24-year old self. I was going through a mom crisis of sorts or a quarter life crisis (maybe a bit of both). “It’s not as bad as it seems”, I thought. “It’s only a few simple tasks.” After going back and forth with myself, I asked myself why it has taken me almost 3 years to come out of the mommy fog and want to regain my sexy?

So many of us lose ourselves once we become moms. We put ourselves on the back burner in hopes that some day things will slow down enough for us to recoup. And well, sometimes that never happens and we are forced to make do, however we need to always make a conscious effort to care for ourselves. No ifs ands or buts.

I’ve since taken care of those breakouts. The culprit? Hormonal birth control. Over it! I now make time to do my nails. I pay more attention to my hair. In fact, I just dyed 3 of my locs magenta and they look fabulous. I’ve also gotten contact lenses, and started treating myself to new glasses so that I can have a variety to choose from. I’ve bought new books to read, a sewing machine, an external flash, a digital drawing tablet, and hubby bought me a guitar. These are all treats that I am making time to get lost in and fuel my happiness.

What part of you have you seem to have misplaced? Are you actively trying to find it? Mom Blogger, Tara Jefferson, provides us with simple ways to find our way back in her Self-Care Challenge. Check it out!

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Sheena Tatum

is the founder of Sophistishe. She's a free spirit, wife, boy mom, rental rebel, curator of pretty things, lover of vintage pyrex, and the tropics. Sheena can be found in NW Indiana with her husband and two scrumptious boys, clutching kraft paper, chalkboard paint, sriracha and chipotle pepper. In the midst of motherhood, wifedom, and managing a growing collection of digital projects, she somehow manages to find zen in being a quirky, introverted, lil’ lady.

10 Comments

  • Reply February 21, 2012

    Stacie

    No matter what our age, we moms tend to neglect ourselves from time to time.
    Two things I’m doing for myself? Painting my nails more and buying better fitting jeans lol.

    • Reply February 22, 2012

      Sheena

      OMG YES to better fitting jeans! NO A SOUL should be out in jeans that sag and bag, lol. Check out this post: http://www.musingsofahousewife.com/2012/01/find-the-perfect-jeans.html

  • Reply February 21, 2012

    Shary

    I just started taking care of myself as well. I don’t know why it takes so long… perhaps I just needed my daughter to start spending more time doing independent adventures. I can’t tell you what changed, but life is a lot more fun now that I feel good about myself.

    • Reply February 22, 2012

      Sheena

      My son is pretty much on auto pilot now, lol. And things in my life have come together around the same time he gained more independence. Feeling good about yourself is so important as a parent because kids often mimic your behavior. They are little sponges.

  • Reply February 21, 2012

    Cat Davis

    I can sooooo relate to this and I’m finally doing something about it. My kids are getting older, I’m going to be 30 in less than a year and I want ME back. I’ve started losing weight, taking care of myself and I’m ready to have my life back (and feel hot while living it).

    • Reply February 22, 2012

      Sheena

      I’m happy you are taking care of yourself, Cat! It usually get easier as the kids get older. How are your nails coming along? ;-)

  • Reply February 21, 2012

    Patrice

    I think every mom has experienced this one time or another. Finding balance between mom and maintaining who you are can be challenging. Given a conscious effort to stay true to yourself and likes prior to being a mom makes all the difference (consistent Starbucks helps too :).

    • Reply February 22, 2012

      Sheena

      I’m so happy to have gotten that episode over with and I promise not to ever let it happen again! It just hurt more because I really didn’t have a chance to know who I was to begin with. For a while, identifying as a mom gave me purpose… still does but, there’s more to life!

  • Reply February 21, 2012

    jane

    1st: i LOVE the pic! 2nd…i’m going to go do my hair now lol…

    this is so true and i need to step on it!

    • Reply February 21, 2012

      Sheena

      Thank you, Jane! Don’t be a stranger!

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