Hello and welcome to my Ultimate Blog Party! If you have no idea what’s going on, check in here. I’m Sheena, owner of this here blog. Not much has changed since the last Ultimate Blog Party, so I won’t restate what’s still current. You all have other blogs to explore!

Jayden will be turning 3 (someone hold me) on April 26th and that Junior High Sweetheart of mine, Greg? We finally got married :). I’m an introvert with a side of shy. I love being around people, but doing so wears me out! I’ve taken up painting as a new hobby and I’m lovin’ it. I wear my hair in dreadlocks (it’s a personal journey) and I love, love, love nail polish. This is a hop, so I’ll keep it short. Feel free to read more about me here and here.

Feel free to introduce yourself in the comments below and link up your UBP posts in the linky! I’m giving away some bareMinerals Pure Transformation Night Treatment below and if you go here, you can enter to win loads of fabulous prizes, including a Fellowes DS-1200Cs Paper Shredder that I donated to the UBP prize pool!

Oh, if you want a chance to win $1,000 cash via Paypal, enter the Boost Your Buzz Giveaway over at SimplyStacie.net!

© Sophistishe 2011 | Permalink | 22 comments - Let's chat!

The bulk of this post was written in November. I guess I should have published it, huh? Oh… and things are looking up and I *think* I may be on my way to blogging more. > This < surely helped :).

When I first became a “mom blogger”, I was so excited to join the community. I was expecting my very first child and I was going to blog with my husband (then fiancé) about how exciting our lives would be. The rainbows, the poop chronicles, the skips throw glorious sunny meadows, the happy family portraits, and trips to the park. Our blog was exciting, but somewhere down the line, we went through some changes. Life started to idle, I lost desire to chronicle firsts, and baby grew up. I still have photos of my lil’ dumplin’ that I have yet to edit and share… with ANYONE.

Jayden is nearing 3 years old and he has lost his new baby smell. He’s a toddler. He can be bratty at times. Yes, I referred to my child as bratty on my blog, oh my! I could call him “strong willed” or “spirited”, but it’s not me.

I remember the days where we could lay him down under an activity pad and he would… stay put. I remember the days when all it took to soothe him was some good ‘ol “Mama Nom Noms” (breastmilk).

I feel like I don’t gush over my child enough sometimes. I don’t even know if the “look at my cute kid” route is what I really want anymore. Uploading photos and videos. It’s work at times. I dunno, maybe I’m just going through a thing. Maybe I should live in the moment and forget about blogging in the moment…

There are times where I want to sit down and blog, but the boy has been trouble all day long. Do I tell it like it is or put on my poker face and end with a Hallejuah chorus with a side of snuggles?

Jenny asked me, “How much time do you spend with your family and friends *not* thinking about blogging or taking pictures, but just being in the moment?”

Before I go on, this is not an attack; just one of my regularly scheduled rambles. Blame the introvert; we bottle, then burst.

Not a day goes by where I’m not thinking about blogging and taking photos. Those two things have embedded themselves in me. No matter how frequently I do them, I still think about them. They may seem like time consuming tasks… but there is a big picture here (heh), at least in my world.

I have this deep want to blog in the moment, but by the time I sit down and get ready to do so, I’d rather not. There’s the process of writing, making sure my thoughts make sense. Making sure I don’t leave anything out. Making sure I am not misunderstood. Making sure the post doesn’t get too long because I actually have to be able to finish it in a timely manner (ugh, like this one). Making sure the post doesn’t come off as half-assed because it’s too short. Making sure that by saying something, I don’t open up a new can of worms that I have to respond to (like asking y’all to ask me questions! Ha!). Longer posts = more mistakes. I end up leaving my incomplete thoughts to be left in drafts or I don’t even attempt starting one because something so simple turns into a long-drawn-out process.

I am finally at a place where I don’t care what people think of my blogging habits. I’m not worried about my personal content to sponsored content ratio. In the past, I let this silliness work me up to the point where I fell behind in my sponsored obligations. I kept thinking, “Crap, I need to write x amount of personal posts before I write this review, host this giveaway, take this opportunity. Maybe I just need to scale back. Maybe I’d be more productive if… Maybe I could focus better if…” If I kept up with this thinking, I’d never get anything done. I did plan on scaling back, instead I created another blog. Whether I took sponsored opportunities or not, I probably would still be lacking personal (unsponsored if that’s what you want to call it) content. It’s just a time in my life that differs (see going through changes and bratty behavior). And I don’t feel like blogging about it every darn day to please others or annoy others with my cryptic or misconstrued thoughts.

Here we go…

My life isn’t all that interesting or adventurous as I’d like for it to be. That statement reads as written. I am not in a dark place. Trying, but not dark. Maaaybe I’ll have something in the next month, but I don’t like to count my chickens before they hatch. In between the terrific two’s, potty training, and sorting out other matters, I don’t have much fodder that excites me to the point of posting. But then again…is it my job to entertain? So anyway, yes there’s a lot going on, lots that won’t be published here (soon anyway). There’s a time and there’s a place. All is as well as it will be for now. That has been my answer to all who have asked, “Sheena, how are you?” I am just focusing on keeping a clear mind and weeding out anything that counteracts with my zen. I’m working towards FABULOUS by the time I turn 25. I’ll be 24… soon.

I blog (see sponsored obligations) so that I can live in the moment. My blogging gigs help me get closer to my online career goals. The more successful I am at what I do (managing a collection of internet businesses; some you see, some you don’t), I can spend less time working towards building those businesses in the future. I can wake up and say, “Hey, lets have fun today ’cause we don’t have to worry about any work that requires our immediate action.” That is the life that I want to live.

Sidenote: Can I just say that success is fully achievable without being in the limelight? Don’t feel like you have to be – especially if it makes you feel overwhelmingly uncomfortable. You don’t have to be all up in somebody’s face to make an impact.

Moving on…

As for taking pictures, I would actually like to do more of that. I’ve be picking up my camera less and less. Winter has that effect on me. I’d rather photograph beautiful flowers, green grass, the playground, the beach… warm stuff.

Taking pictures isn’t something I consider life consuming and I don’t take them soley to publish here. In fact, I think all people should take more pictures to document their lives. Those pictures will be with your loved ones forever and may have a positive impact on the lives of others.

Anyway.

Blogging in the moment, I choose not to do so if I can’t muster up the energy or passion.

I want my blog to display quality vs quantity. My blog is far from crème de la crème, but I’m not going to publish three words and a picture to boost my personal post count. That’s what Twitter and Facebook’s for.

With all that being rambled, I won’t get myself all worked up over blogging in the moment. If I can’t, I won’t. What I should be doing is living in the moment.

This post took me a month 4 months to complete.

*publish*

© Sophistishe 2011 | Permalink | 16 comments - Let's chat!

How annoying is it to have so much stuff that you run out of room to house it or can’t even keep track of what you have? Very. You are constantly trying to figure out how to create more space for the stuff. Maybe if we get another dresser, put up some shelves. What if we move this to the office closet? What are we going to do when we have more kids? There’s just not enough storage space in this house!

Okay, maybe it’s just me.

Last week, Greg and I went through our closet and drawers and got rid of tons of clothes. I had so many “pjs” in the dresser it was ridiculous. Two drawers full. And I had a drawer stuffed full of socks. I was so tired of having so many, I just donated about 3/4 of them. Now my socks and undies comfortably reside in the same drawer. A whole drawer has been freed and all the rest of the drawers are filled, but not filled to capacity. We can find what we are looking for and everything is nice and neat.

We went through Jayden’s wardrobe too because he has grown out of so much. We boxed up what we wanted to keep and donated the rest. I’m pretty sure we have more to purge, but I feel like the bulk of it has been taken care of.

So I’ve decluttered my home, what about my virtual home?

I can’t function in disorder. And I feel like this blog is disorderly. I’ve been wanting to use this place for what it was intended for; my personal blog. But I found skipping out on personal writings and focusing on my campaigns/reviews to be more rewarding. Yea, I said it. And they’ve been all I’ve had time and desire to write about anyway. Life has been so draining and it would have been even more draining writing about it. But everything’s okay now. Really. And I see nothing but greatness in the future.

I’m just tired of the seesaw effect I have with this blog. I haven’t posted anything personal, but I have this campaign due. My blog is full of sponsors. Ah who cares business comes first. Business supports family. I’m not trying to be the “perfect” blogger. I don’t want to post this until I give some kind of a life update. Oh forget it, I’ll blog later. Hiding out is much better. Here comes a follow up and another. Ugh, I better get to my obligations. Maybe I’ll have time to write a personal post. I start it… I don’t finish. It sits in drafts. I fail. Repeat.

I am so over it! It seems I can never get it together and I am ready to move on.

So.

I’ll be exporting all reviews to another location and setting up redirects to avoid 404 errors. I’ll continue to publish reviews/campaigns here in moderation if they are green, diy, health, beauty, and adult fashion related. Ideally, I’d like to stick with those categories for Sophistishe, but as always when starting a new site, I must build up traffic before certain items can be published at the other destination. So there will be a transition period. With this new plan in place, I can review what I want when I want without the guilt, while taking my online business to another level without burying my personal thoughts (when I decide to share them).

Done.

© Sophistishe 2011 | Permalink | 11 comments - Let's chat!

Hello Ultimate Blog Party attendees! Welcome to Sophistishe! If you’ve been here before, hello again! Before I start rambling about myself,

first let me say…

Susan and Janice, you rock. I remember wandering on to your blog 4 years ago. I wasn’t even a mom, but I kept coming back. It has since flourished into a huge venture and growing community. I never would have imagined that I’d be meeting you two 3 years after making my first blog visit! Job well done ladies and thanks for continuing to inspire and encourage bloggers and non bloggers in this community!

Now…

I’m Sheena, you may know me from Mommy Daddy Blog.

I went through a whole episode of blogger burnout and an identity crisis. See here and here.

I am now feeling free. I’m so happy that I can just scream. I would, but I don’t want to scare the neighbors.

Sophistishe isn’t new, I just abandoned it to explore parent blogging when I found out I was pregnant.

It is my personal space. I talk a lot about parenting, but I no longer feel restricted to the topic. If I wanna talk about gardening, home decor, natural hair, or my love for nail polish and Reese’s peanut butter cups, I can do just that.

I am the mother of a charismatic, sometimes drama king of a toddler, Jayden. He’ll be 2 on April 26th!

I am the fiancée to my Junior High sweetheart, Greg. He gives me lots of smooches and back rubs.

I have a passion for photography.

I’m on this better living kick. Anything that makes life more fulfilling is worth a try.

I’m in love with all things tropical.

I feel a little weird talking about myself, so to avoid sounding like the overachiever in High School (which I certainly am not) I will now direct you to my About page. I do a little something in this space.

Follow me on Twitter and Facebook if you want to keep up with my random rambles.

There are loads of prizes to be won during UBP. I’d love to win a $50.00 gift certificate to Amazon, Target, or Priddy Creations. In the event that my top choices are taken, I’d like to add prizes 83, 66, and 1.

I know you all are itching to hop to the next party, so thanks for stopping by! Link up your party posts below and party on!

Pssst…enter my giveaways here.

© Sophistishe 2010 | Permalink | 52 comments - Let's chat!

I have no idea.

I am completely overwhelmed with the love and the support that I’ve received through emails, comments, tweets, and DMs. I mean y’all came out of the woodwork, lol. I really appreciate it. I have ideas for posts that I plan on writing, but my brain is trying to write them all at the same time, if that makes sense.

I want this blog to be like a community. I won’t go full blown forum or anything, but I want everyone to feel as if they are being heard. I love sharing interesting tidbits with people. And I love sharing a good laugh. I intend on replying to every comment – or at least attempting to. And I will be commenting more. I want to increase my presence in this virtual space. I feel like I can do that now I’ve let the cat out of the bag.

I feel like can better my relationships with people and even be there to lend a helping hand. I no longer feel the need to be distant. As the only child, I’ve never been selfish. I’ve always shared, but I have been pretty secretive in the last few years. I just wanted to be careful and I meant no harm if I wasn’t there giving up all of my secrets. I was just never as successful at something like I was with blogging. Ever. Throw in having a family that depended on that success, and you get an information hoarder. There are people out there who are in it to win it and will step on any toes to achieve their goals. I let that paranoia influence my actions. And I’m sorry.

I guess this is the part where we all hold hands and sing Kumbaya.

After I get my bearings, as my grandmother used to say, I shall return. ‘Til next time.

Random Parenting Tidbit: My little smoochie is such a ham. Look at all of those pearly whites! He can’t get any cuter, right?

…more photos on flickr

© Sophistishe 2010 | Permalink | 25 comments - Let's chat!

Warning, this is a long post! I started this post on November 22nd which explains why I said it’s been two months since my last post.

It’s been two months since my last post and I must say that things are good. I look back last year and remember the days when we scrambled to pay bills late and after paying them not having much left over. I honestly don’t know how we did it, but we did it together. During that time, so much was going on, I didn’t feel like blogging here. I was trying to do my thing as as a parenting blogger at Mommy Daddy Blog, so I felt the need to make sure my issues weren’t blasted into the blogosphere. I wanted to keep everything rainbows and lollipops, but we all know life is far from that. I know I like to read happy and uplifting things, the last thing I wanted to do was turn people off. But when you let people into that chapter of your life, your experiences may be comforting to someone who may be going through the same. That’s why I started reading blogs.

I’m working on showing my human side again online. The side I showed before becoming a parent. When Greg and I started Mommy Daddy Blog, I had intentions of running both this blog and that one. I couldn’t keep up. I pushed myself to the side. I started censoring myself in fear of offending readers or the ones who contributed to our cash flow. And I mean it was the little things, not even things that were truly offensive. But I just felt I couldn’t let my true character shine once sponsors came in to the mix. I paid attention to the “image” brands were going for and the other mom bloggers who were climbing the social media ladder. Anything that would give the impression of us not having it together, I simply kept bottled up inside.

I am not the cookie cutter mom in the tv commercials. I’m young and I’m just starting out. I am 23 and Greg is 22. I could care less about any negative thoughts on being young parents or not having a plan in place. Jayden was a surprise, but starting a family was something that we wanted more than anything. He is our everything. Just to give a taste of how badly we wanted kids, our dog had his own bedroom and a wardrobe. We took him wherever we could. I wore him in a sling. Yea. And no, we weren’t one of those couples who compared the struggles of taking care of a pet to the struggles of taking care of a child, but we loved that dog.

Moving on, we are far from the Joneses. And I realize umm we don’t have to be. We are doing a hell of a lot better than many folks who are or were our age with or without kids. But I felt if I wrote about our struggles, opportunities to monetize our blog would not come. The first year of becoming parents was rough financially. We moved to be closer to family, school and job left behind. We’ve resented that move many times. It was like we moved just so that it could be more convenient for family to see Jay. That’s it. And when they saw him, we were coming out there all of the time. Why did we move again?

Some time in between Greg fell out of love with blogging. I’ll let him comment on that if he wishes. I struggled trying to keep things afloat and failed. There’s only so many cutesy picture posts of Jayden that I could post before readers start wondering why sponsors are working with me when the content has gotten so damn bland. I had a hard time taking compliments on something that I wasn’t even proud of. I cringed each time I heard someone tell me how cool it was that both Greg and I blogged together when the last post he wrote was many many months ago.

Things are better since we moved again in September. We are still about the same distance from family and they visit more. Greg’s parents and grandmother pick up Jayden when they can, so we can rejuvenate. Finances are much much better. I realize all of my blogging faux pas and I’m ready to pull myself out of the ditch and continue down the road I veered off of. I’m going back to the basics. That doesn’t mean that I’m no longer participating in sponsored opportunities. Blogging is my business. Running a business is my passion, just not when I am not being myself while doing it. Let me stop and say how thankful I am for my sponsors. I am not blaming them at all for my actions. If it weren’t for them, I don’t know where we’d be. We’ve been truly fortunate.

Personal blogging is something that I really enjoyed for 6 years. I tried something new (mom blogging as I perceived it) and it didn’t work. It’s time to move on. I will be ringing in the new year with intentions of keeping it real. It’s the only way I can be a confident and passionate blogger. Starting over in a sense kinda worried me. But you know what? It’s not about the blog and stats you’ve built. It’s about the person behind the blog. I know my following will meet me here. As I continue to write, traffic from search engines and other sources will trickle in. If I cannot build brand relationships based on being myself, then I don’t need them. Simple as that.

Related Post: Switching Gears To Fuel My Passion

© Sophistishe 2010 | Permalink | 78 comments - Let's chat!